Here’s are some of the worst analogies ever written in high school essays:
- They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth.
- He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
- She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.
- The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.
- McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup.
(via: Deeperdevotion)
Every security checkpoint there is festooned with signs informing you that you must produce two things: (1) Your boarding pass, and (2) A photo ID. Also there are people announcing in loud voices, “Please have your boarding pass and photo ID ready!†Also, as you near the checkpoint, you can see that all the passengers in front of you are being required to produce a boarding pass an a photo ID. If there were an avocado in the line, at some point it would grasp that it needed to produce a boarding pass and ID. But many human air travelers cannot manage this feat. 
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